Since I’m working so freaking hard this morning, I thought I would pass on this awesome gem of a post I found! Enjoy the rocket pube goodness.

ROCKET PUBES!

~KK

(Link via Passiveaggressivenotes.com)

Cracked.com came up with a list of the top 10 “poor man’s version” of great things. Here’s a snippet of goodness:

Jersey Shore: The Poor Man’s Vacation Destination

The Jersey Shore has actual sand and a real ocean, just like every other vacation destination. But, its sand and ocean just happen to be—unlike other “good” destinations—littered with syringes and Red Bull cans. At normal beaches, if you wait long enough, you may catch a glimpse of a dolphin, majestically leaping out of the ocean. In New Jersey, you are guaranteed to see no less than two fights, enough Gotti-wannabe’s to stage an all-guido remake of 300, and an assortment of less-than-stellar sandcastles that are really more cigarette butt than sand.

The ludicrously high number of syringes would lead one to sensibly conclude that every male on the Jersey Shore is either on steroids (presumably because they wanted to get their money’s worth on the “$50-per-each-additional inch of barbed wire tattoo” deal at the parlor on the boardwalk) or heroin (presumably because they like heroin).

You can read the rest of the article here.

~KK

(link found on Digg.com.

In an attempt to thwart further punishment for having dogs fight other dogs, Mike Vick has come up with a new strategy. Dogs fighting… themselves. The evidence:

Bannable Offenses. This guy reminds me of LP and my type of humor. It’s VERY sad that he hasn’t been around lately, but the past posts are gems! Give it a browse when you have time. You’ll find yourself laughing out loud a few times!

~KK

Ultima Online.

I remember back in 1997 hearing about Ultima Online. (UO) I had only played Ultima VIII at the time so I really didn’t know much of the lore behind the series or how big a fanbase it had. Scottie and I decided to give the game a shot one afternoon and we were hooked ever since. I started learning it slowly, but then grew more and more attached. It was something new. It was social. It was addicting.

There were a lot of things I like about it. In a previous post, I believed I discussed why I liked it. I’m to lazy to reread it so I’m going to assume that I did. Instead of rehashing how I almost dropped out of college over that game, I would like to discuss why I think it was ahead of it’s time. Ok ok… I used to play it at my parent’s house all the time. Then I went to college and not much changed. I roomed with Scottie, but he really never was there. I rarely went to class because I’d stay up till 3 AM killing lizard men in the swamp above Trinsic. Man I loved that game.

UO had amazing possibilities. You could start at 50% of 2 skills if you wanted. (Which were always magery and magic resist because it was such a bitch to improve.) From there you could decide what you wanted the char to become. During the char creation screen, you chose your name, strength-dex-int, starting skills at 50% and appearance. That was all. There were no “classes”. You could literally become whatever you wanted to be. The more you used a certain skill, the better you became. This was pretty much how the MMO genre was started.

Starting with EQ, you became pigeon holed into selecting a class. I started as a wizard and more times then now, I wished I was something a little more solo friendly. Like WoW, when you started a character with a class you were always that class. It pretty much sucked if you leveled a class up only to find at level 20/30/40/50 it really wasn’t for you. To remedy this, you would have to create an alt and try again to find something with your gaming style. THIS SUCKS PEOPLE. I don’t care how visually pretty the game is, when you limit your players to something they don’t want to be, you are hurting your game. People get tired of alts. People get freaking tired of taking this object to this person over and over and over and over again. I’d rather lick yank my toenails out with a vise grip! Where is the fun in doing that?!? Why did mainstream MMOs get away from the UO model?

UO also created Player Housing. It was great! It wasn’t perfect, but it felt good to have something you could call your own. The drawbacks were that 1) people could steal your keys to your house, 2) Players placed houses throughout the world (Imagine Barrens filled with houses. This placing houses was a bitter sweet thing. Great because it changed the landscape and felt like you were affecting a game and could claim a little property as your own.) Bad because it cluttered the land.

Where is player housing now? Why do games today limit or not allow them?

I was talking to a friend last night about how UO was the best MMO to date because of the above reasons. He believed that EQ2 and WoW were close behind. His other complaint with UO was the “need” to macro skills up. Yes it sucked, but even with the need of it in the game, it was still worth it since you were able to be so creative with the direction you pushed your character.

Trying to go back to UO now would be hard sadly. The game has changed over the years and isn’t as hardcore as it used to be. The graphics or horrid and that also turns the graphic WHORES off. (Isn’t it amazing how people will turn their noses up at a game if it doesn’t look good? Even if it is a great game, some people can’t get past the looks and that is sad. I’d much rather play a graphicly dated game then one that looks gorgeous but doesn’t really bring anything new to the table.

The good news about UO is there are plenty of Player run shards out there. These shards go from “old school” to ones that have completely new content never seen before. You don’t have to pay for a thing to play and that is a good thing. Feel free to check it out. You just may find something you like.

I guess that’s all for now. I have to start getting to work now so I’ll leave it at that. I hope you all have a great week and don’t get anally molested by someone named “the Carver”. (Nip/Tuck for the fucking win baby!)

~KK

I realllly liked 300. It was the best movie ever made! The ONLY way it could have been better was if it was 300 hot nekkid chicks battling it out by using sex as a weapon… Wait, isn’t that an hentai movie or something? Now there may be some of you who didn’t care for the movie that much and that makes you weird. I have created this post in hopes that it will change your mind. But how can I do that if you’ve already seen the movie, you say. Let me show you!

First up, the 300 trailer that’s rated PG

Picture TIME!

And now the REALLY fun ones!